Not one to make New Year’s resolution?
Neither am I; too much work, too much pressure; might as well not do anything.
But
Under my ‘Joe Cool’ persona who doesn’t do resolutions, was hiding my over-achiever who was scared of not being up to the tasks; that and my panicky perfectionist who was tired only thinking about the amount of effort it may entail, the logistics, the pushing after people to get what she wanted …. I feel her pain, I would have given up too
I need to be realistic too. I am no lady in waiting; I cannot sit indefinitely for something good to happen in my life; I need to be an actor and an engine for my own growth.
Besides, my human brain was born to plan; whether I liked it or not. It is always projecting how it sees my future; and mostly it goes more toward the ‘beware’ than the ‘looking forward’.
I might as well be the conductor here, right?
With a partition…ready to unlock the keys of my heart’s song, in 7 keynotes.
Key 1: the what
Simple enough, what do I want? And yet…
Sometimes we get scared at asking what we want, to the point that we cannot even articulate it in a sentence.
- Is this want or desire too big?
- Too unrealistic?
- Or are we just dismissing it altogether too fast as ‘impossible’, ‘too good to be true’, i.e. I don’t deserve it?
The ‘what’ key is asking us to go for it. In itself, it doesn’t matter whether we think it’s achievable or not, what does is to make it a reality outside the brain, i.e. on paper.
Because now the job is handed to the second key.
Key 2: the why
Mighty little word, and a big ‘key’ in the wisdom song!
‘Why’ invites us to dig deeper below the surface. It’s no longer about asking for stuff, but more about the ‘what’s in it for me?’.
Don’t hesitate to challenge when the words seem to be too rehearsed:
- Is it your want, or are you trying to make someone else happy, even if it doesn’t do much for you?
- Are you trying to keep up with the Joneses?
- Or you want that new home, new car, raise because it feels good?
- because you feel proud of your achievements and victories?
If anything, the ‘why’ is about how do you want to feel. And if the ‘what’ fits the bill, then go for it!
Key 3: the how
Because the next step is how to make it happen! And ‘how’ cannot survive a long time without a strong and determined ‘why’, i.e. the inspiration and the motivation.
Let’s chat ‘how’ for a few.
There are several ways to get going when it comes to goals/resolutions and the likes.
- The hard way – can get you there, but it’s painful and may come at a hefty price of depletion and resentment.
- Or better, the flowy way. Flowy is both adapting and allowing. Not passive but not only in the action (that’s the pushing).
The ‘how’ is about getting into the mindset of co-creation. What we want will imply a certain level of collaboration with others.
Why not make it a valuable experience for ourselves and others?
Keys 4/5/6: the when/where and who with
Talking about working with others…any step in realizing your wants will imply a certain level of decision-making.
Key steps 4, 5 and 6 are all about adapting, again, to the outside world and your environment.
Obviously the when and where.
Mostly and most importantly, picking your team.
My advice here?
If you can, choose people who share certain of your values with you. It makes a whole lot of a difference to interact with like-minded people.
We don’t always have that choice, but when you do, wowwwww, it feels good!
Key 7: your inner GPS
Alright! Almost there! Here is the cherry on the cake, and what makes the real difference between a mere New Year, New Me to-do list and putting a vision into words and actions.
Your internal guide.
Also called intuition, experience, inner knowing, your Inner GPS can act as your trusted advisor, your accountability partner, your coach, your gatekeeper, and much more.
This part is connected to your higher purpose, the place that is not that bothered by the shenanigans that are overthinking, perfectionism and other procrastination.
Our individual inner GPS has their very unique way of communicating their agreement or displeasure to us.
How to know yours?
Build a relationship with your Inner GPS starting with baby steps. It could be as simple as checking the internal response you are getting from foods you like or don’t.
And soon enough, you will have your own internal lexicon for yay or nay.
Best.Relationship.Ever!
Coaching Executives