What do you focus on first? The bad or the good?

December 3, 2019

What will you take with you from 2019?

 

This week, I invite you to do a quick inventory of the year that is finishing soon.

Put a mental sticky-note somewhere in your thinker space.

And start the walk down 2019 memory lane.

What stands out?

What do you focus on first? The bad or the good?

 

We tend to focus on the problems – this is what our brains are wired to do;  it’s how our ancestors survived!

This behavior could be helpful, but most of the time, it is not.

Look back now at 2019.

Are you only seeing the bad and the problems?

Client case study:  I have missed out on life

 

Female Lawyer Partner in a Big Law Firm

  • Has worked herself up the ladder to become a Partner
  • Doesn’t remember taking a day off, aside from 2 short maternity leaves
  • Feels she is missing out on seeing her kids grow and strengthening her marriage

The result:

  • Feels trapped in her current life
  • Feels hopeless and needing to choose between a career she loves and a family she cherishes

My coaching solutions:

  • Work on current priorities
  • Work on freeing time in schedule, including working remotely and 4 days a week

The result:

  • Still on top of her game at work
  • Kids are happy with their new Wednesday’s activities with their mother

Contact me at mayda@maydapoccoaching.com for a free consultation.

Are you a good news or a bad news first kinda person?

 

When given the choice, do you prefer to hear the good news or the bad news first?

I always chose the bad news first so that I am not spending the whole good news time stressing about what’s bad to come next.

Well, it turns out it is a bad strategy!

Do you want to learn why?

By now, you know that the brain loves to look for what’s missing, for what’s not working and for what you don’t have.  And what was a necessity for survival reasons has perpetuated in our behaviors long after we don’t fear being eaten by a wild animal – for most of us.

And guess what, by choosing to receive the bad news first, you are indulging that same part of your brain.   Even worse, your brain starts going into problem-solving and solution-finding and your body starts being flooded by the stress.  And all of that activity will eclipse the good news.

On the other hand, when you start with the good news, your body and brain are in a more neutral state, so you can enjoy the good news, and keep the high from it into less emotionality when receiving the bad news!

Can you try this next time you have one of those situations?